September 2011

We had another poorly attended coaching call last Monday on our ExtRAWdinary Life Course.

... and always the same voices. I do understand some people's non-appearance, though.  Karen is distant from us in many ways. I didn't expect her to be - yet I kind of understand that too... 

I'm not sure if this is her intention. For instance, when I wrote in to ask about her categories for her own journal (that she had been encouraging us at length to do for ourselves) all she was willing to say on that topic, was that hers was similar to the layout of the Diet Programme Journal (which she had sent us).

She added that she used the Living Magically on Raw journal, however, which we did not have, and was 'the best journal, ever!'. C'mon dude!...I just asked for a few suggested categories. Jeeez Louise! ; )

She then said how much she would looove to have me on the Living Magically on Raw course. Nice... But not what I was looking for.

It smacked, just a tad, of a sales pitch. I even understood that, I have to admit. I mean, the gals got a job to do.

Gosh! I'm so full of understanding these days! Must be all the coaching... 

She is great though - I have to say. I love her open hearted, girl-next- door honesty and Libran charm.

I said I'd consider joining LMOR next year and went and read up on it. It looks like it could be more of the same, to me, which would be great. That is, if I hadn't already got somewhere on this course and I had the money to keep throwing at my lack of ability to kick my own butt ; ).

Afterwards, I was a bit disappointed in the way she replied to that question.

The coaching call was great, though, and if I could make the late hours, I would benefit a lot more from them. Getting some live interaction and coaching in real-time would have been a big, fat, bonus on this course. Alas, it is too late for the likes of me. I get up to meditate at 4:00 am. So I need to be in bed by 10. Latest. 

One of my friends on the course said she felt abandoned and out of touch. She added "It 's probably just a projection of my own unresolved feelings of abandonment that have nothing to do with Karen." I think in some ways this could be true.

Protea Serruria family

As soon as I started to notice I was feeling neglected or ignored, I had to ask myself what it was that I really wanted out of this experience. What I know I don't need, is someone to spoon feed me every step of the way. I want to feel changed after this year, inspired to go further with all my personal goals and enriched with new insights into myself. I am the only person who is going to make that happen for me. Also, I am not about to waste the investment I made in this course, just because it isn't turning into a cozy tea party.

Since then, I must say, things have improved.

Ultimately. this is what I wanted out of a coaching relationship - a growing sense independence and the strength and courage to be autonomous, not to find myself locked into a co-dependent relationship.

However, having said all that, this course isn't real coaching, in the true sense of the word. I think one would probably need 1:1 discussion for that to really 'happen'.

I am actually getting a lot of value, from a man I am not in a coaching relationship with at present. A man who's audio's I simply love. like rich chocolate ice-cream. He has the most beautiful voice and way of speaking. It is like he takes each word and places it gently and thoughtfully into my head and heart, where it takes root and flowers quietly with time. His name is  Michael Neill. His newsletter and blog are a continual refreshment of what I know to be true, a hearty meal of good wholesome words, with the addition of sweet epiphanies for dessert! 

Arnold Patent has also been a beacon of light on my current path, exploring the Human Experience. He provides some mind-bending perception on money and the Money Game. 

Wild Flowers - photo by Jude (8)

Companions on the Path

I am also eternally grateful to the other two women I have connected with via the Life course - for each one's encouragement, wisdom and inspiring quests. It is a delicious blessing to bear witness to what someone else is struggling with and hoping to achieve. The 'free gift' I receive, is being continually surprised by the mirror they provids of my own self perception. It helps me feel not quite as isolated in my quest for reaching beyond a' normal' life. I am encouraged to 'get on', knowing that my progress in turn encourages them. We are re-cycling the good stuff -passing it on, handing it around, keeping it flowing!

The Green Way

I just finished watching a movie called Limitless - Robert De Niro and Bradley Cooper (very violent in parts, which I try to avoid in movies) There was something about the way the movie depicted this man's experience on a brain function enhancing chemical, that reminded me of what it feels like when I eat a 100% raw diet for an extended period of time. My determination became totally re-ignited to get to that state again - starting NOW.

I realized, that it is that particular thing about raw food energy, that keeps me coming back to a high raw diet, whenever I have slumped in any way. Physically, emotionally or mentally.

The feeling is literally one of being limitless - like a serene Goddess, with laser sharp focus, yet an inner balance of untouchable poise.

Little Lawn Daisies-photo by Jude (8)

It is so exciting to be reminded that this exquisite state is within my reach to experience again. It takes only 3-4 days of extreme wholesome eating (mostly green juices, smoothies and salads) and I am there again. I want to climb back up to that liquid sunshine experience of existence.

Watch this space for Goddess-like behaviour ; )

Vivid Red Wild Flower - photo by Jude (8)